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Wednesday, December 8, 2010


And we're back w/ Top Chef recaps. This time 'round we are treated to the ghosts of Top Chef cheftestants past.

Season 1: Tiffani, hated her 1st time around. She's overly aggressive and I suspected she was sabotaging other cheftestants. Time has mellowed me because I don't find nearly as irritating.
Stephan, the sommelier. Fancy dresser, very snotty. And I find myself oddly oddly attracted to him. Guess Sylvia Plath was right.
Season 2: Elia, I almost liked her but then she totally lost all her integrity w/ me after she colluded in assaulting Marcel. She's meh w/ me.
Marcel, obnoxious tool box. However, he takes risks and he's pretty innovative.
Season 3: Tre, work horse.
Dale L., hurray! I really like this guy
Casey, I don't know....she rubbed me the wrong way
Season 4: Richard Blais (whom everyone is calling by his surname only) the cocky gastro molecularist. Jesus, Blais, will you quit whining that you did not win yr season!
Antonia, she never really made an impression on me. This time around, I might bet on her.
Spike, blech. Dale, take Spike w/ you!
Season 5: Fabio, every one's favourite Italian. Except me, I never got the Fabio fuss.
Carla, the velociptraptor. She bugs!
Jamie, if she keeps the complaints to a minimum, then I'll root for her.
Season 6: Jen, don't take yrself so seriously. She's an outstanding chef but man she has a bitch face.
Mike I, see Dale & Spike.
Season 7: Angelo, annoying git
Tiffany, nope she still grates.

For the Quickfire Challenge, the cheftestants worked together w/ their season teammates to create a dish that represented the city where they filmed their season. Wow, that was wordy! I hoped I explained it clearly. And the bottom of the barrel were Season 2's overly salted shrimp tacos on a too thin green apple "taco shell" (ick!), Season 1's overly powerful garlic seasoned gazpacho, Season 5's non cohesive trio of apple dishes & another overly salted dish of crab cakes from Season 7. Which leaves leaves seasons 3, 4 & 6 duking it out for immunity. And it goes to Season 4's homemade sausage & mustard ice cream......erm savoury ice cream...idk.

For the Elimination Challenge, the cheftestants had to cook the dish that sent them a-packin'. The only caveat being they can improve upon the dish but not change it drastically. Par example, if you made fish tacos the first time, they could not make fish stew this time.

There was a bit of contention as Blais was called in w/ the best chefs but was immediately sent away as he was still plating after time had run out. I don't think this was done maliciously but then Dale was complaining it was a bullshit decision. Dude, he broke a fucking rule, get over yrself! And winning dish went to Angelo's (BOO!) ramen & Asian spiced pork belly. Begrudgingly, I would eat sounds yum. And 1st to get the boot was Elia because she never changed her loser dish of fish wrapped in a banana leaf.

Shocking decision, Elia's a consistently good chef. Shaping up to a fun season!


Jon in Albany said...

I am impressed that you can keep them all straight. I can't. And thanks for writing this because I don't know anyone else who watches the show and being able to dish about it here is probably good for my blood pressure. And now on with the ranting:

I like Anthony Bourdain. I've read a few of his books. Sometimes watch his show. Thought about going to see him in Schenectady. During the show, I found myself wishing they had found a different judge. Even those English tools with nothing good to say at least said something constructive once in awhile.

"This dish is so bad it makes me think fondly of my last colonoscopy." Think he spent all night writing snide comments to prep for the show by himself or did he have writers helping? Bourdain has admitted in his books that he can't do what these chefs do. Even at his best, he wasn't at their level. And he still has the nerve to put them down like that. If you can't use words to express what makes a dish fail, you have no business being a food critic. "Hated it" isn't good enough.

Bourdain is capable of being a competent food critic. I've seen him do it. Hope he drops the schitck and actually becomes a judge. So far, I say he comes off as a douche bag.

And while I believe that Blais didn't know he was breaking the rules...he clearly broke the rules. Get em next week, chef.

phairhead said...

Jon: yeah Bourdain was overly harsh...makes for good tv i guess :-(