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Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Barack Obama City

Hurray, Top Chef is back! So, I had to invent a system to watch Top Chef as we refuse to be anally raped to get cable. And FYI, it's impossible to download the show illegally off the interwebs. So, the 'rents are in the Adirondacks for the summer & they have TiVo......problem solved :D

As per usual, my first gripe is too many fucking cheftestants. Sheesh! It feels like there's about 60 people competing.

This season the chefs are vying for the title in the sultry city of D.C. Methinks there will be lots of Obama mentions this season.

For the Quickfire Challenge, the cheftestants had a mise en place tourney. First round, peel 10 potatoes and the 12 fastest cheftestants move on to the next part of finely dicing 10 cups of onions. From there, the 8 fastest cheftestants had to break down 4 chickens. Which led to final showdown of the 4 fastest chefs using the chicken, onion, potatoes and whatever else they wanted from the Top Chef pantry to create a dish. It looked freaking hard because they weren't given potatoes peelers. Sheesh! The top four were Kenny (an early fave), Angelo the douchebag, Kevin (no opinion) and Tim (no opinion). Kevin and Tim sucked for using too many condiments. Annnnnndddddd.......Angelo won w/ his douchy roasted chicken wing and thigh, curried onion jam and potato noodles. Kenny got housed!

For the Elimination Challenge, each cheftestant had to create a dish that represented the region that live in. Pretty cool idea. And the twist: the final four from Quickfire chose 3 other cheftestants they would be cooking against. And Angelo the Douchebag tried to sabotage Kenny by throwing the odd chef in w/ his group.

And the wiener was not Kenny :( but Angelo and his Artic char, pickled shallots (the only yum in this dish), tapioca and bacon froth. It looked damn baby spit up! Personally, I think the judges are holding too much stock in the 1st winner of Quickfire winning the Elimination. Packing their knives was John. Lemme tell y'all about John. He has disgusting grey dreadlocks and yellow teeth and hipster glasses. He decided he would make a dessert instead of regular entree for judging. Yuck yucky!

Early faves, the unflappable Kenny, bald Alex who made it to the winners circle w/ his deconstructed borscht and Jacqueline, even though she made gritty pate.

I'm an episode behind, so bear w/ me my fearless readers.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010


Feeling a little flat lately. Nothing too awesome to report about.

I did make a fascinating discovery about myself, I know now why I don't want to be at work. I'm sick of being the work monkey, I want to be a supervisor monkey.

Lemonade Vitamin Water is pretty darn tasty and not so bad for you as far sugars & calories are concerned.

I relented and got some iPhone/iTunes coaching from SB. I now cannot live w/out MP3's.

SB is leaving tomorrow for Swan Lake, NY. I couldn't get the vacation time from my office :( Soooooooo....... I'll be in the Adirondacks w/ my parents for the weekend. Whomp whomp!

Look for Top Chef recap tomorrow

Monday, June 28, 2010

Kit Kat

1) Would you want to be able to see what happened at your own funeral? No, I don't need to see anyone upset because I'm gone for good.

2) Do you ride public transportation? If you've done so in different cities, which one stood out to you? Not any more as I own a vehicle. When I lived in Mexico, obviously, I had to take buses and taxis. They have no regard for speed limits there.

3) What's the last thing you broke? How did it happen? A glass whilst washing it. Good thing about getting hitched, you get to register for that kind of shit.

4) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one. "Nope, no boogies."

Sunday, June 27, 2010


Last night was my first time @ Mahar's. It was fun but I had some reservations. It was fucking hotter than cat piss in there and the ceiling fans did nothing but push the hot air around. And what bar closes @ midnight? Midnight!

But they do have a hundred gajillion beers there. SB had something called Beast, it had a lot of hops. Of course, I had my Lindemann's cherry lambic. It was 12 bucks! Sheesh!

Thankfully, the company of good friends can make any place the best Saturday night ever.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Tired Thunk

The TT questions are brought to you by Bud, the color of Atlantic Ocean and the number 3.

1. It became officially summer on Monday. What's your favorite part of winter? Christmas/New Year's and then it's all down hill from there until May.

2. What was your worst summer vacation ever? The $ Store when I was 17. Idiot boss!

3. Kimber's husband just got the dream job that he's hoped for. So a big shout out to her and Anthony! Tell us about the best job that you ever had. Zone Music & Video, I listened to music and watched movies all day and flirted w/ cute boys. Plus the 40% discount and ordering privileges.

4. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now? I could give a fuck!

5. An alien appears and offers you the opportunity to repeat one year of your life. You will still know everything that you know now. He explains that no matter what you do differently, when you are returned to the present nothing will have changed. What year would you pick and why? 1994 when I was thinner and full of promise.

6. Name three things you have on you at all times. Explain why. Lip gloss, for chapped lips. Car keys because I'm usually driving. A healthy sense of irony because you never know.

7. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it? Swap meet partner back in March.

8. If you could have everyone in the blogosphere read just one of your posts, which post would you pick and why? Anyone of my thunk posts because I'm one funny motherfucker!

9. I recently read that the music industry continues to decline at an alarming rate. In the last year it said the sales of Michael Jackson's and The Beatles' music are the only artists who sales continue to climb. The article stated that the two are holding up the industry. Have you bought a CD or mp3 of either artist recently? I have bought something from The Beatles.

10. What radio ad right now do you find so annoying that you'd rather have a tooth drilled than hear it again? I don't listen to the radio ads, that's why the Good Lord invented iPhones and CD's.

11. Berleen walks into a bar on a hot Minnesota day. At the bar sits a priest, a rabbi and a minister. A ten foot duck walks into the bar right after Berleen. What drink do you think Berleen orders? A pink squirrel.

12. There is a knock on your door. It can be anyone in the world. Who would you want it to be? A sack of money or.....Peter Saarsgard.

13. What would be the worst entertainment or sporting that you could be forced to watch? Dancing w/ the Former Stars of Golf on Ice.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010


This day has sucked. I don't need to be forced into the mandatory "celebrations" at work. Thankfully, I had a client in crisis today and happily ate my lunch in silence w/ my book.

My mother is being gigantic bitch. She said I didn't look I was trying hard enough at boot camp and my clothes were unflattering (which is MomSpeak for fat). She has a tendency to exaggerate and doesn't really listen to me.

And the icing on the bitter cake, I lost something I really love.

Fucking miserable!!!

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Let's Eat

You'll have to forgive me, I've had 2 glasses of pinot grigio and I'm singing Morrissey loudly to Squeaky and SB.

Wanna hear something weird? I went out w/ SB, Albany Jane and Albany John. Wait wait. That's not the weird part. I ordered pork and string beans in garlic sauce (taking a page out of the Profusser's book and loading up on the legumes) at Shining Rainbow. But they brought me eggplant instead, my most hated of all the vegetable-dom. Silver lining: they let us keep it for free. And Shining Rainbow needs to rename the garlic sauce to "AWESOME SAUCE". Then we had gelato at Cristan's. SB wanted to know the difference betwixt gelato and ice cream. I said shut up and eat it. GO and try the coconut. It's delicious and refreshing.

Then more green beans w/ dinner on Saturday along w/ the awesome awesome venison speidies SB made.

And, hey, more green beans at Canali's for SB's grandmother's birthday, along w/ meatballs the size of my head.

For the lovely and talented Albany Jane, here is my recipe for chicken and rice w/ cilantro poblano sauce.

3/4 chopped green onions, divided
1/4 chopped fresh cilantro
1/2 tsp salt, divided
1/4 tsp pepper, divided
14 oz chicken broth, divided
1 poblano chili chopped and seeded
2 minced garlic cloves, divided
2 tbsp olive oil, divided
8 oz mushrooms (i used peas 'cause I hate mushrooms)
1 C uncooked rice
1/2 C water
1 tsp cumin
2 tbsp parsley (or a generous shake of dried)
1 tbsp butter (I like Smart Balance)
4 skinless boneless chicken breasts
1 tsp olive oil
3/4 C cherry or grape tomatoes halved

1) Combine 1/4 C green onions, cilantro, 1/4 tsp salt, 1/8 tsp pepper, 1/2 broth, poblano, and 1 garlic clove in a food processor. Blend until smooth

2) Heat 1 tbsp oil in a large skillet on medium-high. Add 1/4 onions, mushrooms (peas!), and remaining garlic to pan and saute 2 mins. Add cilantro mixture, remaining 1 1/4 C broth, rice, water, and cumin to pan and bring to a boil. Cover, reduce heat and simmer for 25 mins or until all liquid is absorbed. Remove from heat, keep cover and let stand 5 mins. Add parsley and fluff.

3) Heat 1 tbsp oil and butter to large skillet over medium-high heat. Sprinkle chicken w/ remaining salt and pepper. Add to chicken to pain and cook aprox. 5 mins on each side. Remove from heat and cut chicken into slices. Add to rice mixture.

4) Heat 1 tsp oil to small saucepan over medium-high heat. Add remaining 1/4 C onions and tomatoes, saute 2 mins. Add to rice mixture.


Monday, June 21, 2010

Who's There?

1) Have you ever been to South America? If you had to go somewhere on that continent, where would you go? Nope, I'd go to Colombia because I think I could get away w/ my mangled Spanish.

2) What is the hardest promise you've ever kept? The one to myself about losing weight.

3) When you see pictures of yourself as a child, do you think you look the same as you did then? Kinda, my smile is eerily the same.

4) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one. "Concrete jungle"

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Thunks R' Us

The TT questions are brought to you by Kimber, the color of success and the number 1567.

1. Have you ever wondered why snakes can't slither backwards? Ummmm....I'm pretty sure they can.

2. Is divorce contagious? Yup just like monagamy and breeding.

3. Do you enjoy hiking? YES!!!!!

4. Is there a color of a shirt a man should just never wear? Piss yellow

5. Have you read a news story this week that just made your blood boil? Nope...

6. Do you keep old business cards or name tags from companies you have worked for? Nyah, out w/ the old, in w/ the new.

7. If you could save an endangered species, which one would it be? Dodo, no question. How fucking awesome would that be??

8. When is it warm enough outside for you to start wearing shorts? The week before Memorial weekend, even if it's 50 degrees and raining.

9. Have you ever broken a window? Heh heh. Yeah. The best one was batting practice w/ a golf ball when I was 10. My mother was really unhappy.

10. Do dogs in your neighborhood howl when they hear sirens from police cars or fire trucks? There's some old and mean dogs that howl at every little fucking thing. Stupid dogs!

11. Have you tried doing something as an adult that you used to be able to do as a kid? A back bend. That worked about as well as you think.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010


True confession time, I was a big metal dork when I was in high school. I wish I could say my first concert was The Cure but no no, it was a double bill of Tesla and Great White.

Of course, as with any obsession I had in my teens, I grew tired of metal. It seemed dated and corny and passe. All things I didn't want to be as I slowly remade myself.

Over the course of the past few days, I been downloading all my fave music from my youth. (for free but don't tell anyone!) I've gotten a few from Voivod, an awesome awesome prog thrash unit. It sounds like a futuristic robot beating up a car. I got to meet the leader singer when I 18. I made a total fool out of myself. I kept shaking his hand and saying "OH MY GOD! I LOVE YR MUSIC! I'VE BEEN LISTENING TO SINCE I WAS 13!" And some Pantera, cause I like it mean and dirty like them. And lucky me I saw them twice before they disbanded. And a bittersweet favourite, Queensryche. My "friends" and I listened to them ad nauseum. My best memory is driving up the Northway in K's Firebird to Lake George. She must have been doing 80 and we had the stereo at full volume. And we all had our fave members of the band that we crushed on, we had teenaged fantasies of running away to Seattle, the city Queensryche is based in. I loved rhythm guitarist Michael Wilton. He waved in my general direction when I saw them at the Knick Area (now the Time Union Center).

I feel like I've divulged a very dirty secret...

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Plop Plop Fizz Fizz

I admit it, I'm not a big beer fan. I hardly ever drank in high school, save the OCCASIONAL Bud. Which...eww! It tastes so tinny and gross.

My first semester at SUNY New Paltz, I had to keep up with the Joneses and I discovered I kinda sorta liked Corona, or at the very least it didn't gross me out as much as other beers.

After college, I stayed far far away from beer. Why spend my hard earned money I something I didn't really enjoy in the 1st place?

I've gotten older, my cute little taste buds have changed and I fell in love w/ Kreig cherry lambic. It's so sweet and bubbly and by the end of the bottle you don't realize how fucked up you are. It's awesome!!! Unfortunately, the shit is expensive and highly caloric, so, I temporarily switched to Coronitas Light. I figure w/ a salted lime I could choke it down. (That's a 7 oz. Corona Light for those of you not in the know) They're not bad if you drink them fast.

Also hailing from Mexico is Sol. A beer I used to drink non-stop during my semester abroad. If yr lucky enough to find it at yr local beer store, I say buy it. It's not a bad little lager and w/ a salted lime, c'est magnifique.

Then my pallet meet it's beer soul mate. Saranac Summer Ale. It's beer w/ lemonade! I'll say it again. Beer w/ LEMONADE. It's light and crisp and oh so delish!!! In Britain they would call it a shandy. I call it awesome.

Time for another round...

Monday, June 14, 2010


1) Are to trying to keep your age from showing? Do you care if you look your age as you get older? Well, I actually I look younger than my age, so no biggie.

2) What do you hold on to when life gets hard? My boy and, sadly, food.

3) Do you feel that you've wasted time in your life? YES! For about 5 or 10 years.

4) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one. "Freshly washed sheets"

Saturday, June 12, 2010

There's a Fly in my Soup

I'm an avid reader. I taught myself to read at age 5. I am never without a book.

And now that we've bought a house, we've incurred many more expenses than my book leisure fund will allow me (we just replaced the hot water heater w/ a tankless system. CASHOLA!) So, I've banished myself to the local library. Now w/ 50% less drunken homeless people! And there's a cop there. I might have to go to the nicer suburban library but they don't have a cupcake bus there.

Anyways, I'm rambling...... I picked up a book called "The Recipe Club". I didn't really look inside the jacket. I assumed it was non-fiction. WRONG! OK then, it's probably a compelling story about food and friendship. WRONG! It was a poorly written collaborative piece between 2 awful awful writers w/ badly drawn derivative stock characters and their asinine problems w/ a few recipes thrown in. I swear, a 10 year old could have done a better job.

Please stay away from "The Recipe Club" by Nancy Garfinkel & Andrea Israel. If you want good food fiction, check out "Like Water for Chocolate".

Off to re-read a Tom Perrotta novel.....

Thursday, June 10, 2010


The TT questions are brought to you by Berleen, the color of my rocking tan I've got going and the number 45.

Driver's Ed. Demon #1 is taking it right now. Did you pass your driver's test the first time you took it? Yes indeedy! And the dude from DMV had the nicest eyes.

You are sitting outside on your deck in your comfy lawn chair, feet are up and the temp outside is perfect. There are no bugs to bite you and ruin the night... it's peaceful and all you can hear is the birds singing and an occasional cricket. Whats in your hand? Iced tea or pineapple juice w/ coconut rum.

How many graduation parties and weddings do you have to attend this summer? Ok.. how many are you invited to? Zero and zero.

There is no other choice in the matter - you must transform into a different race, but the catch is that you get to pick which race. What will you now be? Mexican Indian

Someone once said that the grass isn't greener on the other side... are you jealous of your neighbor's lawn? More like their lawn furniture. It's all simple and Japanese.

Bud is walking along a beach barefooted and steps on a piece of glass buried deep in the sand. His foot is bleeding... does he cry, swear or stomp around on his other foot? He shoves his foot in his mouth and sucks on his wound.

I'm gonna take you fishing... are you going to be a whiny baby and not bait your own hook and when you catch a fish am I gonna have to take it off the hook for you? I'm gonna shove that worm on the hook so fast it'll make yr head spin!

From a Facebook friend: When asked what would you bring with you to a deserted island, why doesn't anyone answer "a boat"? Because most people would rather die on land than in the water.

Hamburger buns - sesame seeds or not? Eh... I could go either way.

From Demon #1: Whats your favorite flavor of water? EWWWWW flavoured water is disgrossting! I like regular old tap water.

Eclipse is coming out this month... are you going to see it? I'd rather shove rusty pitchforks in my eyes.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

You Said It!

Over the weekend, SB and I went to Plattsburgh for a housewarming/kid's birthday party. It's a long drive, the weather was really muggy and there was big assed insects biting the hell out of us.

By 9:30 p.m., I came to an important realization: I have a low tolerance for large groups of people. I felt like smacking a ho! And I sure as shit didn't feel like sitting outside in the "sand pit". (Our friends built a log home and have no lawn) Plus, I was full of meat and logy! One burger, one hot dog, a piece of grilled curry chicken and a whole lotta of taco dip. Dang, I love that stuff!

So, I packed it in and read and fell asleep.

Check out SB's awesome magnet art. He's so creative!

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Hostess w/ the Mostest

OK folks, I could no longer resist the siren song of the Bettie's Cupcake double decker pink bus. And I had to go to the library anyway.... (did you know you can get books for free?!) so I got purchased 4 little pockets of joy.

What you see here is a chocolate w/ vanilla frosting and mini M&M's, red velvet, vanilla w/ chocolate frosting and a cosmo. 12 bucks, 3 dollars a cake. Should have gotten the 6 pack but I didn't want the extra cuppies around the house.

This is cosmo, still not sure what the exact flavour is but the frosting was lime.

Here's SB making love to the red velvet.

Very tasty cakes, dense and moist. I hate dry and airy! I just wish they were cheaper and bigger.

Stay tuned for more reviews from Bettie's....

Monday, June 7, 2010

Rainy Days and Mondays

My apologies for the delay: this was all set to post last night when Blogger exploded rather dramatically.

1) Do you know how to diagram a sentence? Right now, nope. But if I was given a little time to brush up on basic grammar, then HELLS YEAH.

2) How close are you to your parents? We're a tight knit family.

3) Have you ever tried to put out a fire? I accidentally set a cook book on fire and my stove nearly went up in flames. Cook book in sink, salt on burner. Whew!

4) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one."Geronimo!"

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Sir Psycho Thunky

The TT questions are brought to you by Bud, the color of Santa's Beard and the number 3333.

1. When was the last time that you made an excuse for not doing something that you shouldn't have agreed to do in the first place? Wait....what?

2. Without identifying the person, is there someone in your life that you'd like to shake some sense into? Heh heh. Oh yes!

3. Did you ever really care if Tiger Woods cheated on his wife? Not especially

4. Did you watch the last episode of LOST? What did you think happened? Fuck yeah! The flash sideways was purgatory. And whatever happened on the island, really happened. Still.... many many unanswered questions.

5. If your dining room china was made in Mexico, why is it still called china? Refer to the song "China" by Tori Amos

6. Tell us about your favorite movie of all time. Oh golly! I think I'll go w/ "Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory" today. It's the first movie I really recall wanting to watch over and over. I would even write short stories about Willy. Good times, good times!

7. Do you think it's fair to get thrown out of a meme? Sure, if yr being a jack ass.

8. Berleen lives in Minnesota and Kimber in Arizona. If they were to meet halfway, where would they meet? The northeast corner of Colorado.

9. What do you think of heterosexual marriage? It's a privilege.

10. What would you change about your life if you had just one wish? Job satisfaction

11. How pissed are you that we posted late? Not at all.

12. Tell us about a recent great day. Singing in the truck w/ the hot sun shining on us.

13. When was the last time that you juggled? I am not physically capable of juggling.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Drink Me

In an effort to reduce my gut, I've been following the not a diet diet teachings of "Eat This, Not That". And the little substitutions have been helping but I still have this lingering spare tire.

Enter "Drink This, Not That". I've been doing my damnedest to drink at least 64 oz of water or fresh iced tea daily. I learned this lesson the hard way when I nearly passed out at boot camp. FYI, do not eat pasta w/ bechamel sauce on a hot day and then try to do squat thrusts. I nearly booted.

Here's my latest and most awesome purchase! An iced tea maker. It works on the same basic principles as a coffee maker, tea goes into a filter (you can use loose or bags), add water & press a button. The only difference is you have to add ice.

I like to add fresh mint to my iced tea to give a hint of sweetness, I never use sugar or sugar substitute.

Another yummy low cal treat I've been drinking down is choco-mint shakes. Sweet and filling!

2 C Breyer's Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream (contains no yucky additives!)
1 C milk, I use skim and it's still tasty
2 chocolate mint cookies, or 4 100 calorie Grasshopper cookies (they're half the size of a Thin Mint)

Blend until smooth.

And most critical of all, I will no longer purchase Coke Zero. After reading "DTNT", I found out how harmful the sugar substitute used in diet colas can be. I'm not saying I won't ever drink soda again but I definitely am not going to bring 8 packs into my house any longer.

And I can enjoy fresh iced tea all year long.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Rocking in the Free World

We hit up the mountains for the long weekend because, coincidentally enough, both our families have places up there. It was pretty quiet, I ate a lot of edamame. The water was fr-fr-freezing!

The highlight had to be listening to awesome classic rock in Sexybeast's truck. Yeah, that's right, I said truck. I rocked out to David Bowie and The Cars. It was the best sunny day I've had in a long time.

Sadly, the insects ate us alive...