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Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Pump w/ Me

Get yrself a shot of insulin, it's Top Chef recap time!

For the Quickfire Challenge, the cheftestants were greeted by former Top Chef Masters & homicidal maniac Hugh Acheson & had to make a dessert whose flavours would make a new & great flavour for Extra chewing gum. In addition, the winning cheftestant would get 25 g's and their tasty dessert as a new gum flavour. I just wrote the word flavour a whole mess o' times! Sucking it were Rebecca (WHO?) & her lackluster pannacotta, Cranky Pants Melissa & her coffee/banana/passionfruit pile of poop and Cutey Matthew's oatmeal raisin cookie. Damn, I hate oatmeal raisin! The winner was Craig's breakfast for dessert pancakes.....seriously? Pancake gum? Blllllaaaahhhhhh....

For the Elimination Challenge, the cheftestants were once again divided into two groups. Enough w/ the group challenges!!! This time they had to cater a tea party for some botoxed rich bitch named Lisa Van Der Pump, she's flat out gross. Fortunately, every cheftestant I like was on the winning team. And packing it up was Nelson and his oversized cotton candy crap on a stick.

Post viewing thoughts: Melissa was picked last again & yet she can't seem to figure out why. Perhaps it's because yr an ego-centric argumentative bitch? Orlando is now out of the closet w/ his asshatery.

2 comments:

Jon in Albany said...

I was in the checkout line and picked up a pack of Extra Strawberry Shortcake gum. It is not good. There is a sweetness to it but the overwhelming flavours (I'm with ya!) are artificial and chemically. I don't want to imagine what they would do with stuffed pancakes. But the pancakes Craig made had to at least taste good on the plate and I was all set to eat my previous negative comments...but Craig's winning effort was backed up with "If you didn't have immunity you'd be going home." I guess timing is everything.

The guest judges looked like truly horrible people and your take on Orlando made me laugh. Nice one.

phairhead said...

Jon: I'm not sure what self respecting pastry chef wants to be immortalized w/ a pack of sugary icky gum